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For those looking at this thread for the first time, it contains the compilation of the posts that people have made in the ever-going 5-Word Story thread. As this thread's first page consisted of the entirety of chapter 1, this post begins chapter 2. 
Resuming with posts #4433-4670...
It was a dark and stormy knight who rode his tired old trusty steed named Triggered (formerly known as "Snowflake") in search of safe spaces where there's land, lotsa land, and a cowboy needs a bunch of stuff that knights of the round table often did.
Silly dances atop tables hoped men with dollar bills all lined up to donate a kidney to prevent the Liverpool Heart Association brain trust from running out of coffee for National Insomnia Awareness Day with guest speaker Freddie Krueger of Bogeyman and the Babadooks featuring Baba Yaga and the Baba Looey as the bandaged Buckaroo Banzai and the Hong Kong Phooie's Phooeymobile which can transform into an aardvark when they twitch their nose like Jeannie the genie and her friend Samantha Stevens, the witch and classmate of Sabrina, who was smuggling waffles into Siberia in exchange for muffins from the Muffin Man on Drury Lan Industries' evil Board of Fleet Street barbers named Sweeney Todd's Toddler Brigade, scourage of kindergartens and nursery schools from Addis Ababa to Zanzibar by way of Aluquerque via Toledo's famous Intergalactic Paper Clip Museum used as a cover for interstellar trade in priceless lint sculptures crafted by blind lycanthropic yetis in the awful sweatshops of ALF's shaggy armpits.
Naturally, this undercut roguetech's "Executive" range of personalized alpaca trainers designed to harness the true power of bacon when crisped to perfection according to the pre-war calendar established after Bacon's Rebellion became too much for the Shock for Spock's stock picks so he had to resort to Vulcan mind-melds with hive-minded swarms to sneak a peek into Wal-Mart's Grand Opening in Tacoma, Washington with Tom Tuttle and the Toupes triplets tangoing to tantalizing tenor tremolos, 'til tacos and tamales became one gigantic amorphous mass that threatened and, more importantly, triggered the Butter Mountain Landslide of 2024 and the Boston Molasses Flood requiring the Pancake Tower of Pizza to shed a few waffles during the Maple Syrup Season, in which marshmallows are ruthlessly rounded up and ripened in Gatorade and whisky to appease the femme fatales in Yosemite Sam's favourite bar and feed store where ammunition can be used to barter for pallets and pallets of bacon.
If neither that rogue fella nor stenchy pegged leg pyro-ate absconded with all the booty (and the bacon as well), the town's anti-rogue and anti-pirate suggestions typically failed miserably causing Karen to write sternly-worded letters to former managers merely to have them shredded without reading War and Peace in an hour, thoroughly disappointing their English Bulldog familiars and vexing all the children being fattened in an attempt to make them tastier and easier to catch, unless they use skateboards and steam-powered pogo sticks which tend to overshoot their targets by leaps and bounds leading to broken windows, promises and ceramic elephant pottery cluttering every nook and cranny.
Sealing the ceiling with sealant sealed the baby seal's doom in the Ceylon sea lane to Seattle's Seelie Court so Lucille could see Lucy's unseelie and unseemly collection of cheese sprites, who she lured in Seven Up-scale members of society with the offer of pre-grated and graded great Grateful Dead grey teddy bears, holding discombobulated the already stupefied strangers from witnessing Rogue clipping his toenails with hedge trimmers along with rocket-propelled chainsaws with depleted uranium blades personally autographed by the Anti-Knife League of Pittsburgh Penguins, whose "blades" are on their belly board skillet combos used to scrape ice off the Hoboken sauna and rabbit fur-lined and goose feather filled compost pile with a massage by rabid tigers with bad acne whose Acme wholesale business of selling pre-owned water-front warehouses is underwater.
As the ball thoroughly tangled into Abe Sapien's hairy highbrow puppets of Henderson Junior High School's mascot, Harry Horatio Hinxley-Hornblower XXXIV, emulated Hubert Horatio Humphrey's hideous hirsute pathetic people of Space General, prompting General Space of the lightsaber and Wookie hot wax consortium after retiring as reigning curling iron juggling runner-up for Miss Congeniality award at the Texas Gun Show in Paris, Idaho's biannual tricentennial luau that went vegan over the objections of those with any sense of taste.
Catastrophically, this was also the moment when Wendall the Manatee was transitioning from being a dugong to an interdimensional combat specialist via mail-order lessons arriving in reverse order, causing incredible hilarity to break out among the natives, throwing their heads back and forth laughing at the Kung-Fu fighting that practically predicated a panda pandemonium quizzically questioning questing Quebecois quislings rightfully rousted roughly from ragged sushi support sashay sashimi topping tumultuous trends twixt toppling unusually undulating underling umbrellas upon voluptuous vixen's vexingly vacant vaults while waxing wyverns wane woefully to xanthic xeric xanthations excreted yellow yeti youth yoyos yelling "Zounds! We zonked out zanily!"
On the dark and stormy surface of planet Kolob, the Knights of the Round Table wondered if square tables would mind being called Hector Ticklebottom by the Knights' dinner table dancers, Ethel and Gertrude, who were previously Ernie and Gary, which Sir Yvain the Bastard suspected was due to the jousting accident in which both took each other's eye out, just as their mothers warned, and lost their dress sense since all of the cents had strange cents, since sincerely sent science sentences seemed sufficient to tantalize turquoise turban truckers upon unequivocally undermining Uzbekistani undertakers causing the alliteration police to overload their mobile lyrical inhibitor during the rounding up of rogue vocabulary that didn't conform to Rogue's strict coolness quotient and argyle sock knitter which lived under the nearby bridge in an old refrigerator box that Sparko used to pretend was a mighty ship of fools.
As flocks of brants swarmed the decks, they ate eight aight hating aides aiding by baguettes bobbing beside boilerplate cicadas chirping ceaselessly, causing consternation, causing the alliteration police to pass sentence, ending the sentence.
Meanwhile, on the other side of the tracks, Riff Raff was plotting to stop Underdog's above board demeanor with below-the-belt dastardly devious devilty, done deceptively, even evilly, eschewing every excellent fair fares for fair females.
Great going, getting governor gals hired for higher hoarse horses in Indeliable Indian Ink Incorporated's just jerking jackalopes, joining jam karaoke kangaroos karate-kicking Korean kimono-wearing lazy lay-about lavender llamas languishing morosely, minding miniature mouse mansions needing needles needlessly naming neeks.
"Overly ornery orthoptera occluding ornate putti ponderously prancing past pansies?" queried Quincy the Queen Quaker.
Rakishly, relentless rascals ran roughshod sideways sane skids, swapping squash to titillate the trembling troglodytes ululating uvulas undergoing ulterior undulations verily vexing vivacious Venusian vixens wantonly waiting while wily warmhearted xenophobes Xeroxed the xylophones.
"Xeriouxly?" young Yolanda yawned. "You're your zealous zebra zeroed zesty zeniths antithesis. And Auntie Annabelle always boisterously breaks big blue buckets containing crabby crustaceans completely covering dainty daisy-print delft-ware dishes donated enthusiastically every eleventh evening except for frosty Fridays in February gaining great gumption, given Gladys hauled hangers to hangars' halls in irreplaceable illicit indigenous intimates."
Junky junkie's jean jock-straps just know Kentucky's kickboxing kangaroos keep lackadaisical lessons lessening latter ladders making mummified Montanans.
Mumbling morosely nixed Nick's naval nun's navels over overly obstinate ostriches' objections pertaining to past passed pale pails queued for quarts of quartz really right report, read rapidly.
I figure one more post ought to finish off the last of the current batch; will be coming shortly.
Resuming with posts #4433-4670...
It was a dark and stormy knight who rode his tired old trusty steed named Triggered (formerly known as "Snowflake") in search of safe spaces where there's land, lotsa land, and a cowboy needs a bunch of stuff that knights of the round table often did.
Silly dances atop tables hoped men with dollar bills all lined up to donate a kidney to prevent the Liverpool Heart Association brain trust from running out of coffee for National Insomnia Awareness Day with guest speaker Freddie Krueger of Bogeyman and the Babadooks featuring Baba Yaga and the Baba Looey as the bandaged Buckaroo Banzai and the Hong Kong Phooie's Phooeymobile which can transform into an aardvark when they twitch their nose like Jeannie the genie and her friend Samantha Stevens, the witch and classmate of Sabrina, who was smuggling waffles into Siberia in exchange for muffins from the Muffin Man on Drury Lan Industries' evil Board of Fleet Street barbers named Sweeney Todd's Toddler Brigade, scourage of kindergartens and nursery schools from Addis Ababa to Zanzibar by way of Aluquerque via Toledo's famous Intergalactic Paper Clip Museum used as a cover for interstellar trade in priceless lint sculptures crafted by blind lycanthropic yetis in the awful sweatshops of ALF's shaggy armpits.
Naturally, this undercut roguetech's "Executive" range of personalized alpaca trainers designed to harness the true power of bacon when crisped to perfection according to the pre-war calendar established after Bacon's Rebellion became too much for the Shock for Spock's stock picks so he had to resort to Vulcan mind-melds with hive-minded swarms to sneak a peek into Wal-Mart's Grand Opening in Tacoma, Washington with Tom Tuttle and the Toupes triplets tangoing to tantalizing tenor tremolos, 'til tacos and tamales became one gigantic amorphous mass that threatened and, more importantly, triggered the Butter Mountain Landslide of 2024 and the Boston Molasses Flood requiring the Pancake Tower of Pizza to shed a few waffles during the Maple Syrup Season, in which marshmallows are ruthlessly rounded up and ripened in Gatorade and whisky to appease the femme fatales in Yosemite Sam's favourite bar and feed store where ammunition can be used to barter for pallets and pallets of bacon.
If neither that rogue fella nor stenchy pegged leg pyro-ate absconded with all the booty (and the bacon as well), the town's anti-rogue and anti-pirate suggestions typically failed miserably causing Karen to write sternly-worded letters to former managers merely to have them shredded without reading War and Peace in an hour, thoroughly disappointing their English Bulldog familiars and vexing all the children being fattened in an attempt to make them tastier and easier to catch, unless they use skateboards and steam-powered pogo sticks which tend to overshoot their targets by leaps and bounds leading to broken windows, promises and ceramic elephant pottery cluttering every nook and cranny.
Sealing the ceiling with sealant sealed the baby seal's doom in the Ceylon sea lane to Seattle's Seelie Court so Lucille could see Lucy's unseelie and unseemly collection of cheese sprites, who she lured in Seven Up-scale members of society with the offer of pre-grated and graded great Grateful Dead grey teddy bears, holding discombobulated the already stupefied strangers from witnessing Rogue clipping his toenails with hedge trimmers along with rocket-propelled chainsaws with depleted uranium blades personally autographed by the Anti-Knife League of Pittsburgh Penguins, whose "blades" are on their belly board skillet combos used to scrape ice off the Hoboken sauna and rabbit fur-lined and goose feather filled compost pile with a massage by rabid tigers with bad acne whose Acme wholesale business of selling pre-owned water-front warehouses is underwater.
As the ball thoroughly tangled into Abe Sapien's hairy highbrow puppets of Henderson Junior High School's mascot, Harry Horatio Hinxley-Hornblower XXXIV, emulated Hubert Horatio Humphrey's hideous hirsute pathetic people of Space General, prompting General Space of the lightsaber and Wookie hot wax consortium after retiring as reigning curling iron juggling runner-up for Miss Congeniality award at the Texas Gun Show in Paris, Idaho's biannual tricentennial luau that went vegan over the objections of those with any sense of taste.
Catastrophically, this was also the moment when Wendall the Manatee was transitioning from being a dugong to an interdimensional combat specialist via mail-order lessons arriving in reverse order, causing incredible hilarity to break out among the natives, throwing their heads back and forth laughing at the Kung-Fu fighting that practically predicated a panda pandemonium quizzically questioning questing Quebecois quislings rightfully rousted roughly from ragged sushi support sashay sashimi topping tumultuous trends twixt toppling unusually undulating underling umbrellas upon voluptuous vixen's vexingly vacant vaults while waxing wyverns wane woefully to xanthic xeric xanthations excreted yellow yeti youth yoyos yelling "Zounds! We zonked out zanily!"
On the dark and stormy surface of planet Kolob, the Knights of the Round Table wondered if square tables would mind being called Hector Ticklebottom by the Knights' dinner table dancers, Ethel and Gertrude, who were previously Ernie and Gary, which Sir Yvain the Bastard suspected was due to the jousting accident in which both took each other's eye out, just as their mothers warned, and lost their dress sense since all of the cents had strange cents, since sincerely sent science sentences seemed sufficient to tantalize turquoise turban truckers upon unequivocally undermining Uzbekistani undertakers causing the alliteration police to overload their mobile lyrical inhibitor during the rounding up of rogue vocabulary that didn't conform to Rogue's strict coolness quotient and argyle sock knitter which lived under the nearby bridge in an old refrigerator box that Sparko used to pretend was a mighty ship of fools.
As flocks of brants swarmed the decks, they ate eight aight hating aides aiding by baguettes bobbing beside boilerplate cicadas chirping ceaselessly, causing consternation, causing the alliteration police to pass sentence, ending the sentence.
Meanwhile, on the other side of the tracks, Riff Raff was plotting to stop Underdog's above board demeanor with below-the-belt dastardly devious devilty, done deceptively, even evilly, eschewing every excellent fair fares for fair females.
Great going, getting governor gals hired for higher hoarse horses in Indeliable Indian Ink Incorporated's just jerking jackalopes, joining jam karaoke kangaroos karate-kicking Korean kimono-wearing lazy lay-about lavender llamas languishing morosely, minding miniature mouse mansions needing needles needlessly naming neeks.
"Overly ornery orthoptera occluding ornate putti ponderously prancing past pansies?" queried Quincy the Queen Quaker.
Rakishly, relentless rascals ran roughshod sideways sane skids, swapping squash to titillate the trembling troglodytes ululating uvulas undergoing ulterior undulations verily vexing vivacious Venusian vixens wantonly waiting while wily warmhearted xenophobes Xeroxed the xylophones.
"Xeriouxly?" young Yolanda yawned. "You're your zealous zebra zeroed zesty zeniths antithesis. And Auntie Annabelle always boisterously breaks big blue buckets containing crabby crustaceans completely covering dainty daisy-print delft-ware dishes donated enthusiastically every eleventh evening except for frosty Fridays in February gaining great gumption, given Gladys hauled hangers to hangars' halls in irreplaceable illicit indigenous intimates."
Junky junkie's jean jock-straps just know Kentucky's kickboxing kangaroos keep lackadaisical lessons lessening latter ladders making mummified Montanans.
Mumbling morosely nixed Nick's naval nun's navels over overly obstinate ostriches' objections pertaining to past passed pale pails queued for quarts of quartz really right report, read rapidly.
I figure one more post ought to finish off the last of the current batch; will be coming shortly.
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