Announcement

Collapse

Christianity 201 Guidelines

orthodox Christians only.

Discussion on matters of general mainstream evangelical Christian theology that do not fit within Theology 201. Have some spiritual gifts ceased today? Is the KJV the only viable translation for the church today? In what sense are the books of the bible inspired and what are those books? Church government? Modern day prophets and apostles?

This forum is primarily for Christians to discuss matters of Christian doctrine, and is not the area for debate between atheists (or those opposing orthodox Christianity) and Christians. Inquiring atheists (or sincere seekers/doubters/unorthodox) seeking only Christian participation and having demonstrated a manner that does not seek to undermine the orthodox Christian faith of others are also welcome, but must seek Moderator permission first. When defining “Christian” or "orthodox" for purposes of this section, we mean persons holding to the core essentials of the historic Christian faith such as the Trinity, the Creatorship of God, the virgin birth, the bodily resurrection of Christ, the atonement, the future bodily return of Christ, the future bodily resurrection of the just and the unjust, and the final judgment. Persons not holding to these core doctrines are welcome to participate in the Comparative Religions section without restriction, in Theology 201 as regards to the nature of God and salvation with limited restrictions, and in Christology for issues surrounding the person of Christ and the Trinity. Atheists are welcome to discuss and debate these issues in the Apologetics 301 forum without such restrictions.

Additionally and rarely, there may be some topics or lines of discussion that within the Moderator's discretion fall so outside the bounds of mainstream orthodox doctrine (in general Christian circles or in the TheologyWeb community) or that deny certain core values that are the Christian convictions of forum leadership that may be more appropriately placed within Unorthodox Theology 201. NO personal offense should be taken by such discretionary decision for none is intended. While inerrancy is NOT considered a requirement for posting in this section, a general respect for the Bible text and a respect for the inerrantist position of others is requested.

The Tweb rules apply here like they do everywhere at Tweb, if you haven't read them, now would be a good time.

Forum Rules: Here
See more
See less

How much should you try to help someone?

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • How much should you try to help someone?

    Last night as I'm getting out of my car, a woman coming down the street says, "Am I heading in the right direction for the food box?" There's a house down the street that has erected something similar to a "Little Library", except instead of books, it's for leaving nonperishable food that is free to anybody who needs it. The woman told me she had been kicked out of her house and was really hungry. I told her she was heading in the right direction and turned towards my front door when I was struck by the verse, "Whatever you do for the least of them, you have done it for me." So I turned back to her and said, "I have some lunch meat, if you would like that." She says, "Do you have a can of tuna?" This caught me somewhat off-guard, so I just said, "A can of tuna?" She says, "Yeah, a sandwich, and maybe some juice." Then before I could respond, she says, "I'll just go see what they have in the food box, and then I'll be back."

    She never came back by my house, but I wondered if I should have done more to try and help her. Should I have been more insistent? Did I fulfill my moral obligation? Maybe I'm overly cynical, but my thought is that if I offer help to someone who is asking for it, and they turn it down or ask for something else, then they really must not be in need. "What would Jesus do?" is a rather trite saying, but in this case, I really do wonder what he would have done.
    Some may call me foolish, and some may call me odd
    But I'd rather be a fool in the eyes of man
    Than a fool in the eyes of God


    From "Fools Gold" by Petra

  • #2
    It’s often difficult to know what to do on the spur of the moment.

    I think your response was the right thing. You offered help, she didn’t take it, you can’t do much more than that, really.

    Jesus never forced Himself on anyone who came to Him and turned away.


    Securely anchored to the Rock amid every storm of trial, testing or tribulation.

    Comment


    • #3
      This is always a toughie.

      We don't want to encourage slothfulness, but we don't want to neglect to aid somebody who's really in trouble.

      I've often said, "I'd rather accidentally help somebody who didn't deserve it than NOT help somebody who did".

      We're gonna make mistakes.

      There's also the complication that some people are mentally confused or deluded or don't really know what they want.

      This is why our community maintains a central faith-based help center, because there are so many people out scamming the system.

      This is something I deal with as a big part of my "day job", so I'll be happy to discuss this.

      Did the woman look mentally confused? Could she have had a mental problem?

      The first to state his case seems right until another comes and cross-examines him.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Cow Poke View Post
        Did the woman look mentally confused? Could she have had a mental problem?
        It's possible this was the case, but I couldn't be certain if it was mental confusion or emotional distress brought on by circumstances. She was carrying what looked like one half of a window frame, something about four feet long joined with a two foot piece at a 90 degree angle. It was dark, so I couldn't see it clearly, but it seemed odd that someone would carry something so unwieldy. It crossed my mind to have the police do a drive-by check to see if she was okay, but I didn't.

        Usually people approach me as I'm leaving a grocery store with a cart full of food, and my response in those situations is to offer them whatever they need from from my shopping cart. I've never had any takers. In fact, one woman even said, "I don't want to take your food, I just want money for a sandwich," to which I said, "I'm sorry, I can't help you with that." Last night's encounter didn't have nearly so obvious a solution, which bothers me.
        Some may call me foolish, and some may call me odd
        But I'd rather be a fool in the eyes of man
        Than a fool in the eyes of God


        From "Fools Gold" by Petra

        Comment


        • #5
          It all depends on the details.

          I was once fully prepared to give money to an obvious alcoholic who would have certainly spent the cash on alcohol. He was standing in front of a liquor store and shaking, which looked like DTs to me. He never asked me for anything, but was looking pathetically at everyone going into the store. I thought "When I come out I will give him some cash because he's hurting, and probably too proud to beg." But before I got there, the guy ahead of me gave him money. It was just the sight of him that struck me. He needed to get off the alcohol but this wasn't the time for it.

          Anyway, I've been scammed before, based on what I observed afterwards. It all depends on the circumstance - and it depends on what my particular situation is at that moment, too.
          "You should just assume going forward that if I am ever wrong it is a typo" - Backup
          "
          Reality simply does not change based upon consensus or desire." - rogue

          Comment


          • #6
            Sometimes there will be someone asking for money for food at a store. What we usually do is to buy a package of soft flour tortillas, package of cheese and a package of lunch meat. those travel well in a backpack. or a sack. It's quick and easy to do. I hardly ever give anyone money...I don't carry much usually anyways.
            "What has the Church gained if it is popular, but there is no conviction, no repentance, no power?" - A.W. Tozer

            "... there are two parties in Washington, the stupid party and the evil party, who occasionally get together and do something both stupid and evil, and this is called bipartisanship." - Everett Dirksen

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Littlejoe View Post
              Sometimes there will be someone asking for money for food at a store. What we usually do is to buy a package of soft flour tortillas, package of cheese and a package of lunch meat. those travel well in a backpack. or a sack. It's quick and easy to do. I hardly ever give anyone money...I don't carry much usually anyways.
              I had a guy hit me up for money saying he was hungry, so I gave him $5 (this was several years ago when that would have been enough for a value meal at any fast food restaurant). He looked at it and said, "I'd really like enough for a steak dinner," and then grinned sheepishly when he realized I wasn't going to give him more.

              ​​​​​​My thing is, the woman last night seemed like she may have had a genuine need yet refused my offer for some reason. Should I have tried harder?
              Some may call me foolish, and some may call me odd
              But I'd rather be a fool in the eyes of man
              Than a fool in the eyes of God


              From "Fools Gold" by Petra

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Littlejoe View Post
                Sometimes there will be someone asking for money for food at a store. What we usually do is to buy a package of soft flour tortillas, package of cheese and a package of lunch meat. those travel well in a backpack. or a sack. It's quick and easy to do. I hardly ever give anyone money...I don't carry much usually anyways.
                That's true. I rarely carry much cash anymore either.
                "You should just assume going forward that if I am ever wrong it is a typo" - Backup
                "
                Reality simply does not change based upon consensus or desire." - rogue

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Mountain Man
                  My thing is, the woman last night seemed like she may have had a genuine need yet refused my offer for some reason. Should I have tried harder?
                  I'd say "no." I mean, she never asked for anything in the first place. Why keep making the offer?
                  "You should just assume going forward that if I am ever wrong it is a typo" - Backup
                  "
                  Reality simply does not change based upon consensus or desire." - rogue

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I have to say I have become way too cynical regarding online asking for money by people. In my towns facebook page I see people asking for things like money for Christmas presents or to help a sick relative or whatnot and lately I have become way too suspicious of people just trying to scam people. I don't want to be that way but I am. I think it has to do with me giving $50 to a lady on the group a couple of years ago because she said she didn't have enough money to buy her son a Christmas present. Then a few months later she was complaining because she paid $40 to have her car detailed and they didn't do a good job. I mean, if someone is so poor they can't buy their kid a Christmas present, then why would they throw money away detailing a car that they could do themselves?

                    And downtown, there are lots of scammers pretending to need help, "I need money for gas" "my car broke down and I need money for a tow"

                    I am at the point that I am very leery to give anyone money. I will gladly buy them a meal, or give them food or clothes.

                    I don't want to be like that, but I just don't trust people.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Mountain Man View Post
                      This caught me somewhat off-guard, so I just said, "A can of tuna?" She says, "Yeah, a sandwich, and maybe some juice." Then before I could respond, she says, "I'll just go see what they have in the food box, and then I'll be back."

                      She never came back by my house, but I wondered if I should have done more to try and help her. Should I have been more insistent? Did I fulfill my moral obligation? Maybe I'm overly cynical, but my thought is that if I offer help to someone who is asking for it, and they turn it down or ask for something else, then they really must not be in need. "What would Jesus do?" is a rather trite saying, but in this case, I really do wonder what he would have done.
                      I think she got what she needed at the food box and that is why she never came back. You offered her help and she wanted something else. I actually think asking for juice is not an essential either but that is me being mean-spirited.

                      For me it is different as a woman when a man asks me for help. I once went over and above very unwisely, and got a few years worth of a stalker as punishment.



                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Mountain Man View Post

                        I had a guy hit me up for money saying he was hungry, so I gave him $5 (this was several years ago when that would have been enough for a value meal at any fast food restaurant). He looked at it and said, "I'd really like enough for a steak dinner," and then grinned sheepishly when he realized I wasn't going to give him more.

                        ​​​​​​My thing is, the woman last night seemed like she may have had a genuine need yet refused my offer for some reason. Should I have tried harder?
                        Naw, it's harder when it's a man / woman thing. She might think you have ulterior motives, or may have had problems with men. That's not all that unusual.
                        The first to state his case seems right until another comes and cross-examines him.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Cow Poke View Post

                          Naw, it's harder when it's a man / woman thing. She might think you have ulterior motives, or may have had problems with men. That's not all that unusual.
                          This. She might have freaked out if you suddenly went after her.
                          Watch your links! http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/fa...corumetiquette

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            I appreciate everybody's feedback. The thing I always try to take away from these experiences is to come up with a general plan for if I encounter them again.
                            Some may call me foolish, and some may call me odd
                            But I'd rather be a fool in the eyes of man
                            Than a fool in the eyes of God


                            From "Fools Gold" by Petra

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Esther View Post

                              I think she got what she needed at the food box and that is why she never came back. You offered her help and she wanted something else. I actually think asking for juice is not an essential either but that is me being mean-spirited.

                              For me it is different as a woman when a man asks me for help. I once went over and above very unwisely, and got a few years worth of a stalker as punishment.


                              I think MM did all he could do too.

                              Here in downtown LA where I live, I get hit up for money on a daily basis. I know that the person (and I can tell if they're a skidrow regular -- not trying to be mean, but I've lived here long enough to know) isn't really hungry because of the missions and endless churches that come out here to serve food regularly (in fact, you'd be shocked to hear how good homeless folks eat here in LA). So I know that the chances they use the money for drugs are very high, so I'd actually be serving evil to give them money for that reason. It all depends on the circumstance.
                              "What am I doing here?" -- Joe Biden 2021

                              Comment

                              Related Threads

                              Collapse

                              Topics Statistics Last Post
                              Started by KingsGambit, 05-24-2022, 07:27 PM
                              3 responses
                              29 views
                              2 likes
                              Last Post NorrinRadd  
                              Started by KingsGambit, 05-11-2022, 11:16 PM
                              12 responses
                              78 views
                              0 likes
                              Last Post Cow Poke  
                              Started by Thoughtful Monk, 04-27-2022, 01:50 PM
                              7 responses
                              55 views
                              0 likes
                              Last Post KingsGambit  
                              Started by Thoughtful Monk, 11-05-2021, 11:31 AM
                              36 responses
                              300 views
                              0 likes
                              Last Post Thoughtful Monk  
                              Working...
                              X