No Longer Convinced

[Zymologist]

I hope you do not think that is my position. I would not be surprised if that violence or physical abuse experienced by children can sometimes create a kind of circle of violence that continues to repeat itself.

I wasn't sure, so thanks for the clarification.

[robrecht]

... I'm not sure why people who are opposed to spanking seem to always think that spanking leads to violent behavior ...

I hope you do not think that is my position. I would not be surprised if that violence or physical abuse experienced by children can sometimes create a kind of circle of violence that continues to repeat itself.

[robrecht]

"Biblical" psychoanalysis(?).

No, just friendly banter.

[The Remonstrant]

I was spanked as a kid, and I have nothing but respect and love for my parents. I didn't turn out particularly violent, either.

I'm not sure why people who are opposed to spanking seem to always think that spanking leads to violent behavior, citing this or that anecdotal evidence, while ignoring the wealth of anecdotal evidence to the contrary. (Like mine, my parents', all of my siblings', my friends', etc.)

Some kids may need different punishments than others. I just don't really understand the crowd who appear to argue that spanking is never appropriate.

[Zymologist]

I was spanked as a kid, and I have nothing but respect and love for my parents. I didn't turn out particularly violent, either.

I'm not sure why people who are opposed to spanking seem to always think that spanking leads to violent behavior, citing this or that anecdotal evidence, while ignoring the wealth of anecdotal evidence to the contrary. (Like mine, my parents', all of my siblings', my friends', etc.)

Some kids may need different punishments than others. I just don't really understand the crowd who appear to argue that spanking is never appropriate.

[The Remonstrant]

That tells us nothing except your own biases.

I have difficulty imagining Mary and Joseph beating Jesus or even James, but it would not surprise me all that much if Saul of Tarsus was beaten as a child.

Of course; it was not meant to say anything else. I think Mary and Joseph were probably very good parents. We know much less about Paul's parents, but he did seem to have a bit of a violent streak as a young man, persecuting those with whom he did not agree. Do you disagree?

"Biblical" psychoanalysis(?).

[robrecht]

I'm pretty sure we don't have the means to answer that question. Some children need rather more correction than others.

I'm certain we don't! Most of my questions will be answered in the world to come. I look forward to a lot of very exciting discussions in purgatory!

[Littlejoe]

For years and years, I was brought up to believe that "spare the rod and spoil the child" was some kind of a biblical mandate.

Well its not. Its not a verse its not in the Bible. It says this:
Proverbs 13:24 “He who spares the rod hates his son. But he who loves him is careful to discipline him.”
.
I looked up the word for rod, Its shebet, which is more like a walking stick that shepherds use to guide their sheep not hit them.

the more I read verses come up like these:

Proverbs 22:15 “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it from him.”

Psalm 94:12 “Blessed is the man you discipline, O Lord, the man you teach from your law;”

Proverbs 1:7 “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.”

Proverbs 6:23 “For these commands are a lamp, this teaching is a light, and the corrections of discipline are the way to life.”

Proverbs 13:1 “A wise son heeds his father’s instruction, but a mocker does not listen to rebuke.”

Proverbs 15:5 “A fool spurns his father’s discipline, but whoever heeds correction shows prudence.”

Hebrews 12:9 “Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live!”

Hebrews 12:11 “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”

Ephesians 6:4 “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.”

What it really says is guide our children, not beat them. Obviously something has sparked this. I was thinking about the horrors I have heard and read from the book "To train up a child." And its not an isolated incident. All over the U.S. People are speaking up regarding abuses within the Church body, and it seems to come from areas that misinterpret and twist scripture from either ignorance or personal gain. So I wanted to investigate what these scriptures really said. Guide. Lovingly. Shepherd our children.

Yeah, the Pearl's take a lot of flak from the anti-spanking crowd, so I have to say you poisoned the well nicely with your "horrors" from the book. I read the book several times...some of the "horrors" had nothing to do with spanking. For instance, one parent couldn't get their child to potty train. So to clean them off, they used a garden hose to hose them off, it was IIRC, in the fall season, so the water was pretty brisk. One child learned quickly that wasn't a great idea. The other one they tried it on, gritted his teeth and endured it. So, instead, she wouldn't let him have any powdered sugar on his French toast and that changed his mind. (HOW Abusive!) So to say that the book ALWAYS promotes abusive behavior completely misses the point of the book. In fact, the method of spanking advocated in the book is far from abusive IMO. They advocate using a paddle, and to spank no more than 3 swats and pause to listen. The crying changes from pain, to sorrow if you know what to listen for. Using this method, I raised 3 children who listened and obeyed, but still have strong minds and wills. I know I spanked my daughter for the last time around 5 yrs old. She had a bad habit of drawing on the walls. After several other "discipline methods" failed, I used this method to spank her. I never had to spank her again. If you ask her today if she fears me, she will tell you no. But she has always respected and loved me.

Another thing advocated in the book is TRAINING! They teach you a very good principle. To train your children by playing a "game" with them. Have them do silly thing at your command. Like, run to the door and touch it with your Left big toe. Balance this toy on your head. Hop on one foot while counting to ten. Playing this game for about 15 to 30 minutes several times a week, teaches them to obey you quickly, while building your relationship with them and having fun. So, I totally disagree your take on the book.

[One Bad Pig]

That's the traditional doctrine, not sure if most still believe it, assuming they're even aware of it. As for James, the question still remains, was he pious and righteous because he was beaten or in spite of it? Or was it completely irrelevant?

I'm pretty sure we don't have the means to answer that question. Some children need rather more correction than others.

[robrecht]

Don't most Catholics believe that Jesus was Mary's only child? Further, James had a reputation for being extremely pious himself - even among the Jews.

That's the traditional doctrine, not sure if most still believe it, assuming they're even aware of it. As for James, the question still remains, was he pious and righteous because he was beaten or in spite of it? Or was it completely irrelevant?

[One Bad Pig]

Oh, I know, but it's still hard for Catholics to imagine the Blessed Virgin Mary hitting a child.

Don't most Catholics believe that Jesus was Mary's only child? Further, James had a reputation for being extremely pious himself - even among the Jews.

[robrecht]

Okay. I still get surprised sometimes, there are whacky shows on cable.

I only watch a couple of shows on TV, most of them reruns. I'm currently making my way through all of the episodes of Frasier, in addition to the current seasons of Mad Men and Da Vinci's Demons. There are still occasional episodes of Law & Order that I haven't seen yet. I like it when the bad guys go to jail. This is more than enough for me until College football starts up again.

[Sparko]

The shepherds' rod is not the same thing as his staff. The Staff, the one with the crook at the end is the guiding tool/walking stick used to keep the sheep together, pull them from precarious situations, etc, . The rod was a weapon/club used to protect the herd and discipline wayward sheep.

[Cerebrum123]

Not in this thread he didn't. I pointed out the same things and got called a literalist (still chuckling) for my trouble.

You assumed by casting about the semantic domain that the verse didn't teach something... Something obviously driven by your personal bias against it as evidenced by your later out of proportion inflammatory comments about what things are punishable and then pointed to other verses where guidance is meant--- as if the two are mutually exclusive!!!!- and then pointed back to your assumption as proof. Ta da!

[Cerebrum123]

Catholicity's method:
1) Assume without warrant that shebet is referring to a shepherd's rod
2) As a result of 1), apply the context of sheeprearing to the respective proverbs
3) She gets her desired eisegesis!

Everyone else:

Don't forget #4, accuse those who disagree as being "literalists".