Perissos Resources

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Effective Methods for Recovering From Grief

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  • Effective Methods for Recovering From Grief

    I'm a grief specialist in my pastoral counseling ministry. I direct the GriefShare DVD-based group recovery program at my church. It's an excellent program with very well-produced video material which I supplement with group discussion and the workbook provided with the program materials. I find myself comparing everything else I find online on grief recovery to this program, so I've established GriefShare in my mind as the gold standard. So, when I saw this video this morning, I felt torn about whether it is useful for comforting the grieving or not...even whether it's creepy or not. I may be too close to the subject, so I welcome your opinions. The video is about 7 minutes long, FYI.

    Thanks for your feedback!
    " encourage each other and build one another up." ~1 Thessalonians 5:11

  • #2

    Still welcoming feedback from anyone willing to invest 7 minutes to view this video.
    " encourage each other and build one another up." ~1 Thessalonians 5:11


    • #3
      (does that ever help if someone is grieving?)
      If it weren't for the Resurrection of Jesus, we'd all be in DEEP TROUBLE!


      • #4
        It's awfully sad video. Don't really like hearing the description of the baby dying. Their baby is with Jesus now. It is good to keep an eye on the eternal perspective. The first few minutes are pretty tough to listen too, just because the very idea of a baby dying is sad.
        If it weren't for the Resurrection of Jesus, we'd all be in DEEP TROUBLE!


        • #5
          I am a Christian and my step-sister died and then my stepmother died years later and my mother died within months of my stepmother. The stress was very hard even with an eternal perspective. I asked my wife to drive me to one hospital after I visited another hospital.

          I still worked when my stepmother died because I had to. I turned my attention from the physically dead to the living and I cried less than other people but I still hurt.

          Let's talk about an eternal perspective. Jesus wept when Lazarus died and none of you would say Jesus didn't have an eternal perspective.

          People die that I don't know that well and I get all emotional and there is nothing I can do to feel differently.

          People also hurt me in this life and you have to be willing to walk with people when they are hurting. People without the answers listening helps.

          We had lunch with a lady who was going to school for her Master's in counseling and she basically said she could do tremendous damage to people from counseling. I'm not Catholic but a Christian school University professor said that the Catholic Church will pay out a billion dollars because of counseling.

          The people we try to help are also the ones that get hurt and unfortunately, a jury will side with them.

          The video? It was someone else's tragedy. I feel bad for them. Unfortunately, it doesn't help me.


          • #6
            He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

            This is a passage about Jesus Christ:

            Isaiah 53:3

            The word translated "sorrows" means also pains of any kind. But the beautiful rendering of our version may well stand, since there are many places where the word used certainly means "sorrow" and nothing else (see Exodus 3:7; 2 Chronicles 6:29; Psalm 32:10; Psalm 38:17; Ecclesiastes 1:18; Jeremiah 30:15; Jeremiah 45:3; Lamentations 1:12, 18, etc.). Aquila well translates, ἄνδρα ἀλγηδόνων The "sorrows" of Jesus appear on every page of the Gospels. Acquainted with grief; literally, with sickness; but as aeger and aegritudo are applied in Latin both to the mind and to the body, so kholi, the word here used, would seem to be in Hebrew (see Jeremiah 6:7; Jeremiah 10:19).

            The question then becomes what kind of counseling should be employed and what is normal grieving?

            I don't want to slam you but at the same time death is part of the curse and God put the curse there for a reason.

            Thou believest that there is one God; thou doest well: the devils also believe, and tremble.


            The normal response for demons is to tremble at the power of God and God put suffering in our midst and it could be a school master to bring us to Christ. It doesn't mean that positive thinking is going to somehow get us over pain.

            Hell or pain is put there to make sure cow thieves stop stealing cows. I don't know if God made a way for us to just give up the pain we experience in life.

            Years ago my dad couldn't swallow after falling and after being in a hospital. He got what is called "Delirium"


            My unscientific answer is that delirium comes from the number of times you had surgery, being in an unfamiliar place with tubes and wires hooked up to you in a hospital setting, etc. I see it as a form of brain damage from pain. My dad might have had his tonsils out and he went through the horrors of World War II where his buddies came back in pine boxes.

            After going through all the pain in this life, I'd rather accept heaven and not want to leave to come back here.


            • #7
              Originally posted by Chuckz View Post
              He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.....
              Glad you're still here.

              Just sayin'.

              The first to state his case seems right until another comes and cross-examines him.


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