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This is a guy's only forum. No girls allowed. Male bonding time.

In here we can leave the seat up, drink from the carton and talk about manly things without fear of the ladies butting in. You know how they can be.

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Just remember guys, it is NOT about the nail!

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  • Just remember guys, it is NOT about the nail!



    (Gerb posted this on facebook)


  • #2
    And this is a mistake we make time and time again even though I know better. It's easier to fix the problem rather than to just be there and listen.

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    • #3
      If it is fixable, then fixing it eliminates the problem. If a woman just wants to whine in order to get sympathy, when the problem is solvable, then she needs therapy. Some people just like to feel bad and have others feel sorry for them.

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      • #4
        No. A woman is interested in fixing the problem, but first, she wants to establish an emotional connection and make sure that she is heard and understood.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Apologiaphoenix View Post
          No. A woman is interested in fixing the problem, but first, she wants to establish an emotional connection and make sure that she is heard and understood.
          Well it's hard to be heard and understood with a nail sticking out of her frontal lobe. I say yank the durn nail out and then listen.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Apologiaphoenix View Post
            No. A woman is interested in fixing the problem, but first, she wants to establish an emotional connection and make sure that she is heard and understood.
            That is probably the first and second time but when it becomes the twentieth time then it is just someone whining and wanting sympathy/attention.

            I'm always still in trouble again

            "You're by far the worst poster on TWeb" and "TWeb's biggest liar" --starlight (the guy who says Stalin was a right-winger)
            "Of course, human life begins at fertilization that’s not the argument." --Tassman

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Sparko View Post
              Well it's hard to be heard and understood with a nail sticking out of her frontal lobe. I say yank the durn nail out and then listen.
              While I agree with Rogue on what he said, the first and second time, she wants to be heard first. Men aren't like that. That's what makes marriage so unique. You really have to learn to speak and think a different way. Both man and woman do.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Apologiaphoenix View Post
                While I agree with Rogue on what he said, the first and second time, she wants to be heard first. Men aren't like that. That's what makes marriage so unique. You really have to learn to speak and think a different way. Both man and woman do.
                Nah. You are just henpecked.

                Just pull the nail out. If you see the problem then you have listened to her and you can solve the problem. Then if she keeps whining, it is her just feeling sorry for herself for no reason.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Sparko View Post
                  Nah. You are just henpecked.

                  Just pull the nail out. If you see the problem then you have listened to her and you can solve the problem. Then if she keeps whining, it is her just feeling sorry for herself for no reason.
                  No. This really doesn't follow.

                  Besides, any married guy knows that that comfort means you can often get to hold your wife really close. That can be its own reward.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Apologiaphoenix View Post
                    No. This really doesn't follow.

                    Besides, any married guy knows that that comfort means you can often get to hold your wife really close. That can be its own reward.
                    Yeah if you want a whiny pet that uses "suffering" as bait.

                    I had a friend who was dating this one girl who was very independant and athletic. After a while he wanted to break it off and just after he did, she had a car accident and he felt sorry for her and comforted her. From that point on, she used suffering and problems as a hook to keep him. He eventually married her but he was never happy. And whenever anyone was around she would love to list her ailment and give my friend puppydog eyes till he hugged and comforted her. She had back problems, nerve problems, migraines, and so on. Nothing that could be objectively diagnosed.

                    You can hug and love your wife without being a crutch (not talking about you personally Nick) and she can do the same for you. Mutual care and compassion is what a marriage needs. Not someone who is just looking to use suffering as a way to keep someone close or to use as a battering ram against them ("You never listen! How can you treat me like that! I am hurting!")

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Apologiaphoenix View Post
                      While I agree with Rogue
                      And so begins your being doomed.

                      I'm always still in trouble again

                      "You're by far the worst poster on TWeb" and "TWeb's biggest liar" --starlight (the guy who says Stalin was a right-winger)
                      "Of course, human life begins at fertilization that’s not the argument." --Tassman

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Oh women can use that card often, and in fact men have their own cards. I'm just talking about the initial thing. I have many times where Allie can say something and I'll tell her I've already said all I can say and we leave the rest for her counseling sessions.

                        It's a way men and women influence each other. Allie is much more emotion-focused and I'm much more intellect-focused. We rub off on each other in these areas as well.

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                        • #13
                          Cant you form a relationship by taking out the nail?
                          I wouldnt want a nail in my foot. I dont think anyone would. Maybe thats just me though.
                          sigpic

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by TheWall View Post
                            Cant you form a relationship by taking out the nail?
                            No
                            "If you can ever make any major religion look absolutely ludicrous, chances are you haven't understood it"
                            -Ravi Zacharias, The New Age: A foreign bird with a local walk

                            Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.
                            1 Corinthians 16:13

                            "...he [Doherty] is no historian and he is not even conversant with the historical discussions of the very matters he wants to pontificate on."
                            -Ben Witherington III

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Raphael View Post
                              No
                              Why not? It seems like a good starting pount to me.
                              sigpic

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